Maybe, on a long enough time line, given eternity and whatever comes before and beyond, a secret is as inconsequential as the way light falls on a sidewalk.
But in this timeframe, a humans lifespan of a timeline, they can be as monumental as a shovel breaking virgin ground and as devastating as a gunshot. An empire can be built over ages on their webbed foundations, while an institution could be torn down by one in just the flash of a camera. A love to span time, blindsided by a single sentence not uttered, or a friendship torn to shreds given just one single glimpse of something hidden. So… we learned how to hide them, stitch them up inside walls of doubt, and shelter them behind easy, practiced smiles. We buried them in the dirt out back or placed them out like trophies on the mantle, in plain sight but so very well hidden. Some worn against hot skin around their necks, others inked them into their flesh, like wards against the past they swore they would not meet again.
Because the thing about secrets, simple put and easily quantified, is that they can shape our lives and worlds if we let them. They are past and future, present and forever, only given how we choose to hide them.
Part of a series i’m working on, as a way to stretch out those creative writing tendrils a bit. This is the previous(and first) post in the series.
I got a new set of brushes and paints almost 2 months ago, but it wasn’t till this last week that I actually got my hands and wrist messy with their color.I can’t say i’m any good just yet, especially considering I mostly work in tones of black and grey and any kind of color work usually kicks my in the face but I’m working on it. I’ve also been listening to more music again as opposed to just mainlining podcasts for hours and hours on end.
Songs on Repeat this Week:
Billions and Billions– Stellardrone Bad Intentions– Niykee Heaton Me Voy A Quitar De En Medio– Vincente Fernandez Out Tonight– RENT Soundtrack San Francisco– The Mowglis The Light– The Album Leaf Rise– Hans Zimmer
It took over an hour and 1/2 to get here, and once we were within it’s limits, we still had to double back because we missed the very missable right turn onto Main St., going 80 miles and hour and the highway seemed to stretch onto forever and all of a sudden, TURN RIGHT.
There was a local cop who drove past our parked car 2 times while I was messing with the settings, and then drove down the opposite street when finally got out to explore. I could feel his eyes from a distance, but it didn’t feel so much as a distrust of outsiders as just a general sense of diligent watchfulness. Protection runs deep here, and I can’t really blame them. Crumbling brick and brilliant colors mix so lovingly, and my feet crunched on healthy green grass and forgotten trash in equal measure.
It was hot and quiet , the sun scorching the empty sidewalks, with faint notes of country music floating on down from the only business open, the bar down the street. If you asked me though, I would say this place is going to last till the end of days, easily.
Currently life is tumultuous again, in that lovely-brilliant-wtf-is-even-going-on way… but tell me it’s not more interesting this way? Between finishing up my last week at my job, idly re-working my resume and experimenting with just how many hours of sleep I need to not need a nap in the middle of the day, i’ve also been working on this piece and a couple others. I’m considering doing a couple of these kinds (since I’m addicted to drawing swirls and mountains, apparently) and maybe take up screen printing to layer them on soft fabic t-shirts.
First though, lets just see if I can make it to May without combusting from lack of sleep, get crushed beneath unread books I keep buying and not reading and/or end up buying a plane ticket to Alaska ’cause I finally said “screw this place”and went to train Huskies for the Iditarod. I mean thats not likely but you never know right?
A place between here and nowhere. Dogs without collars prowling along the roadside, the tinny sound of AM radio static coming from somewhere down the way and throughout it all I kept having the thought that if I tried to come to this place again later, I might not find it.