( A photo journal following the late told adventures I had with my good friend Kat at the end of May. I’m really terrible at this procrastination thing. Or, really REALLy good at it, depending on how you see it. )
After departing from the mild, slightly surreal horror that was Hartford and New Haven (more on that later…maybe….) me and Kat headed in the direction of Connecticut’s Dinosaur State Park , because well. If it has any kind of mention of dinosaurs, you can bet we were going to go.
It was mostly quiet and deserted except for park employes, which worked out well for me and Kat, given the kind of dorks we can be. We explored inside first, taking in the dioramas and tracing the steps of dinosaurs in the floor and on the walls. Exiting through the giftshop, after buying postcards and not-quite matching tshirts, we moved into the green expanse outside and let mosquitos make meals out of us for a bit. It was slightly muggy, the ground was squishy, we had forgotten to put sunblock on and basically… it was pretty fantastic.
Over the weekend (apart from my mild freakout concerning Lightroom + Photoshop and existing solely in my PJs while deconstructing the Ultron trailer second by second with other fellow enthusiasts on tumblr ) I had the unique pleasure of being inspired by a person who, while very far away, managed to virtually shake my hand and call me friend with some enthusiasm. Distances feel so insurmountable some days, but then there are others where I feel like I could fold up the distance like a map and plunk myself down in a Snow Patrol song, with no regard to time zones or cultural barriers. Friendship seems so often overlooked in the spectrum of influential relationships a person can have, slotting in somewhere underneath “mentorship” and “family” but for me, it’ll always be numero uno.
My musical playlist for these pages was, as usual, utterly strange and I take a special kind of pride that my brain hasn’t dispersed into a cloud of fine mist through my ears from the abuse I’ve hounded on it this weekend.
-Back Home to Me- Sophie Milman
-Chasing Cars- Snow Patrol
-Weird Fishes (Arpeggi )- Radiohead
-Tell Me that You’re Alright- Motion City Soundtrack
-Nara- Alt J ∆
-MGMT- Kids ft. Mia Wray
-The Man Who Sold the World- Nirvana
-Often- The Weeknd (Kygo Remix)
-Lijo- Alina Orlova
Now if only I could find some good songs in German to indulge in while I practice my (really rather lacking) vocab skills. Not that I really need to add more to the nutty-ness but still, broadening horizons are good yeah?
There’s some days that you just need to curl up near your desk, plunk a sketchbook in your lap and listen to every single song Snow Patrol has ever released while drinking tea like it’s a magic creativity potion. Somedays you know you’re going to get stuff done, you really are, all the note cards, pens and planners are lined up like soldiers on the front line of the war against procrastination but… your going to do it all in your pjs and no one can judge you for that.
I finally caved and got Lightroom + Photoshop installed on my mac and i’ve been learning how to use it all over the weekend….while also simultaneously wondering if pursuing the whole photography thing is really what I want, because dear gods this is getting time consuming and the whole “side hobby” thing is starting to get faded into meaninglessness. I don’t want to be a professional photographer, I think there’s already an overabundance of amazingly talented and outrageously brave people doing that for me to even make a small splash in that ocean… but, it’s something I love to do. I enjoy combining it with everything else I do, I feel it’s been incredibly instrumental in helping build the story i’m working on (for what will hopefully be my first book), words spilling easier when I think about how to frame them in the context of a viewfinder. When I put pen to paper to flow lines into sketches, the ideas of how to place them comes from the ways I line up shots, and I find patience for exploring new ideas and styles in the memory of all the adventures i’ve had with my camera bouncing along with me.
Photography has encouraged me to explore more, to wake up earlier, to pursue more more more and my mind feels larger than it did a year ago when I first picked up a camera with real intention. My eyes see more beauty in the ordinary and everything glows more intently in my mind when I focus on the visual elements of a moment, an appreciation for aesthetics as well as the things that break aesthetics. While I might never be the kind of photographer that makes peoples jaw drop and eyes sparkle, I can appreciate the singular joy it’s brought to my life already. Even when i’m exhausted at 3 in the morning, and I would rather die than look at another photograph to edit because i’ve already gone through hundreds that feel utterly lacking, and my heads thunking on my desk in a repeating patter to wake myself up… giving up doesn’t ever feel like an option. And I hope it never does.
( A comprehensive post about what did and did not actually happen in Rhode Island will be coming soon… maybe before or after those Dinosaur Park photographs….for now though, these fit the mood of the week and the urge to put these up couldn’t be denied.)
I’ve had a subscription to Vogue (USA) for as long as I can remember, and the funny thing is, most people that know me in real life would probably be surprised by that. But there is so much artistry, passion and collective effort in each issue, not to mention in each and every spread, that I sometimes wonder why it’s not a given that I would bow my head and speed off into the glossy pages every month. I seek inspiration in many hued fabric colors, find calm in the way the light falls on a models face as she turns to the camera to be captured in a perfect shot, and I fall into the story telling power that keeps me turning page after page until only the back cover is left.
There’s plenty to say for and against the fashion world, and i’ve heard most all arguments worth making. Defending one side or the other isn’t my jam though, I’ll leave that to the more informed and passionate of defenders. I just like to sit in the early morning light, drink my coffee, and fall into the high gloss fantasy that sweeps everything away and sparks inspiration down my spine and through my fingertips.